Okeedokee let's talk about food...

I was driving around today deep in thought about cheese. Now I am a sweet and savory kinda girl. I loooves me some cheese with jelly. Could be goat cheese and fig preserves, could be cream cheese and strawberry jelly...I'm not picky. Although it is nice to treat yourself to a lovely hunk of imported stinky cheese and a rare type or preserve. Anyhow I was driving around in my little blue truck and I was singing along to the hip song "black and yellow" by wiz kahlifa (sp?) and I was all like "cheese and jelly cheese and jelly cheese and jelly"...what would I do for some cheese and jelly? You know how sometimes your like "man I'd cut off my left arm for some bladdy blah blah". No you would't. Or maybe you would. How far WOULD you physically harm yourself to get some of your favorite food!? Is stapling your thigh out of the question? I mean it's pretty fleshy, how bad could it hurt? . I think I would only go as far as say doing some handy work for someone in exchange for said cheese and jelly treat. If I should so happen to be pierced with a staple then so be it. Namaste motherfucker.